The BIG Kahuna

It’s been far too long since I’ve blogged as I’ve been busy developing our clients blogs and social media programs. But I’ll be back with a vengeance this year.

Everyone have a safe and healthy new year!

Seriously LeBron James needs to hire a branding company and soon. Never mind a PR agency, he needs to look deep into his soul and figure out who the heck he’s gonna be.

From a brand image perception he appears to be all about himself and less about his team. After this years NBA finals he tweets:

“The greater man upstairs know when it’s my time. Right now isn’t the time.”

Geez LeBron are you just a moron? I mean doesn’t God have better things to do than decide NBA champions? And how about taking some personal responsibility for your play? Like averaging 3 points to Dirk’s 10 in the 4th quarter?

Magic Johnson went on to say:

He should have said “I played bad, I’m gonna work hard in the summer and we’ll be back”. Spoken like a true unselfish winner.

But then LeBron went on to say that his critics are gonna wake up to their lives (insert I’m rich and you’re not) and nothing is gonna change. They might be happy he lost for a day or a month (insert he thinks we’re miserable people).

It’s like he has no clue. I guess if you want to be the villian of the league then you may not need a branding company because you’ve accomplished your goal.

What do you think? Is LeBron just not the brightest bulb or is this a master plan?

I’ve always said it’s easier to sell a brand down then to try and sell it up. For years Mercedes was well known for making a “base” model and selling it at a premium price but affordable to those that couldn’t spend $60K on a new Benz.

But over the last few years the Kia brand has really been upgrading their products and services. And they’ve been selling at a higher price, and getting it. The cars look great, have lots of options and really are a great VALUE.

Take the Kia Sorento (which I just recently purchased):

The car is safe, has a ton of horsepower and all the bells and whistles and all for in the $20′s.

What do you think of the new and improved Kia brand?

Milk?

Seriously, can’t make this stuff up. Oh, add it with their tagline and you get “Homo Milk, Every Drop Delicious”. Another case of branding gone bad. Thank you Island Farms  for the chuckle and your lack of proof reading capabilities.

Thank you Thule, thank you for making the best product on the market. Your Thule Excursion Cargo box literally saved my wife’s life.

My wife was in a major car accident and our 5000lb Infinity QX4 rolled down a steep ravine. Our Thule Excursion acted like a “bumper” on the roof as my car rolled and rolled over and ended up on it’s roof. It took 2 wreckers to crane it out.

The Thule didn’t even have a dent in it, but look at my Infinity…

If anyone has ever questioned the quality and strength of a Thule look no more. We owe you my wife’s life.

Thank you Thule!

I despise Walmart. I love Target. Walmart is cheap, Target is a value. Walmart is creepy, Target is cheerful. Walmart is depressing, Target is colorful.

I pronounce Walmart as it’s spelled, Target has that french accent.

How do you feel about these brands?

The Nissan Leaf that is.

That’s because the EPA’s tests estimate say the Nissan Leaf can travel 73 miles on a fully charged battery and will cost $561 a year in electricity.

Wow, a whole 73 miles before you need to plug in? Where can I sign up? Is that the best the Nissan brand can do?

Then of course you’ll need to buy a “charging station” and hire a professional electrician to install it at your home. That’s like another $2500-$3500 on top of the already ridiculous price of $33,000.

Have you seen the Leaf? Here’s what $33,000 gets ya if you want to feel like you’re actually making any change to the environment (which you won’t be):

But wait, there’s more…it takes ONLY 7 hours to charge, yippee! And the battery only lasts 5-10 years then throw the piece of junk away

Oh and where do you charge your new shiny Leaf after you’ve used up your 73 miles in less than 90 minutes? Are states set up with docking stations on every street? Block? 100 mile radius? And then what do you do for the next 7 hours?

Look I’m all for using green energy when it makes sense. I have solar panels on my house that run my water heater and pool pump. But the math added up and payback was within 4 years. This is a grossly overpriced vehicle that looks bad and doesn’t deliver on it’s primary function…getting you somewhere you can’t walk to!

I imagine it will sell just fine to the yuppie tree huggers, they’ll have something to talk about at their next kumbaya meeting but to the average American this is just ridiculous. Even after the $7500 government rebate the car will run you almost $30,000.

For this program to actually work it has to be mainstream. There NEEDS to be charging stations on every street. And the only way to do that is make the damn ugly paperweight affordable to the average Joe!

Mark my words, this will be a branding failure. It may take a few years but it is destined to fail. Americans want more if they have to sacrifice style and function.

What do you think?

Check out the video my client made using their “stress relief” brand identity that we created for them. Wouldn’t you like to work for a company like this?

We were hired by an educational cloud computing company to develop a brand name, tagline, logo and website.  We positioned the company as a company built for speed, total commitment and high pressure. We named the company:

11th Hour

As you can see we took the very prominent #2 pencil and worked it into the identity because their target market is K-12th grade.

We then developed their new blog-website here:

http://www.11thhournow.com

We also set them up on Facebook and Twitter and trained them on the use of social media and how to leverage their brand identity in that medium.

Very cool project!

On a Segway.

Um, er, ah…that may be a problem for brand Segway. If the owner of the company can’t avoid a cliff what does that say to potential buyers?

Granted the owner, James Heselden, is not the inventor or original owner of Segway. He just bought the company a year ago.

But dying on a Segway…what say you?

A few years back we helped our client Humboldt Storage and Moving create their new brand identity “stress relief”. And they’ve done a fine job at delivering that message consistently. Here you can see the logo design, tagline and truck design we implemented.

Great job guys!

I always laugh at people who think branding doesn’t make a person feel a specific way for a company or product. Take this very funny viral video made to discredit Apple’s iPhone and brand.

WARNING, this contains adult, vulgar language:

Let’s just say all these things are true and Evo’s phone makes the iPhone look outdated and behind technology, how does one explain the sales,  loyalty, dedication and overall brand committment to Apple?

One answer. Branding.

You can do all kinds of great stuff with WordPress. You don’t have to stick to standard templates.

Check out our latest project for the Parrot Club, a Gaming Entertainment Center in St. John US Virgin Islands.

We also tied their Facebook and twitter accounts to their blog for automatic updates as well as using NetworkedBlogs.

So you’re Seattle’s Best and Starbuck’s wants you to re-brand. Why re-brand? Well because being everything to everyone is much better than targeting a market and differentiating…right?

Now that Seattle’s Best is expanding into Subway’s and Burger King’s it’s time to change a good brand to accommodate all those lower end types that visit those restaurants…that’s the thinking right?

Check out the email I got from Mandi Armond at Cohn & Wolfe, a subsidary of  WPP:

Hi Scott ,

Seattle’s Best Coffee, sub-brand of Starbucks, announced recently a new logo, as part of an overall effort to repurpose the brand. Recent expansions by Seattle’s Best into partnerships with brands such as Subway and Burger King, show that parent company is eager to use Seattle’s image as a more affordable coffee to their advantage during the recession.

I would like to offer an executive from Landor Associates, one of the world’s leading branding and design consultancies for expert commentary on the Starbucks/Seattle’s Best brand, as well as the new logo and marketing efforts. The firm’s executive staff is highly knowledgeable about Starbucks’ brand strength and has previously commented for other outlets, as well as on their own corporate blog, about the introduction of VIA, the controversy over the legality of carrying a gun in the stores, and most recently Starbucks tea sales to China.  

Please find below my signature, a sample of some of their previous commentary and Landor corporate blogs on the topic.

If you were planning any stories about Seattle’s Best, Starbucks, or the new logo, please let me know and I can organize an interview for you with one of the Landor executives.

Cheers,

Mandi Armond for Landor Associates

415-365-8553

cohn&wolfe

mandi armond | cohn&wolfe | assistant account executive | 415.365.8553 | mandi.armond@cohnwolfe.com

Here are my thoughts, you may not like them:

“The parent company is eager to use Seattle’s image as a more affordable coffee to their advantage during the recession.”

Brilliant, I change my identity all the time in a recession. When things are slow I lower my prices and work for clients that I ordinarily wouldn’t work with. Hell I HAVE to keep the money coming in. When the recessions over I’ll just change it back. Presto.

So what’s the new logo look like? Keep in mind the new target audience is much wider now and they are more “affordable”:

Wow, what a change. Honestly it’s worse than clip-art. It does say “cheap” though, I must admit.

Apparently this new identity was developed by “Creature Agency”.

Isn’t there a point where you have to say, wait a minute here! You want to do what? They have completely bastardized Seattle’s Best Brand to a commodity?

I guess if you follow the rule for recessions you can’t blame Creature Agency for taking the project, after all the money flow needs to happen. But I can tell you one firm who wouldn’t have….mine.

What say you kahunas? Agree or disagree?

That’s how Dish Network described the TV show American Idol the other day. Interesting brand switch away from the main judges and host:

 Simon

Randy

Kara

and Ryan

I bought a very expensive outdoor grilling set including frig, ice maker, bar etc. from Lynx. Lynx is known to be a “high-end” brand. The name means something when it says Lynx. It means expensive, quality and sophistication.

So when my ice maker broke down I called a repair company. He called Lynx to repair it and Lynx referred him to Hoshizaki America as it turns out they are the manufacturer of this product. Lynx just stamps their logo on it.

Here’s the Lynx and Hoshizaki models (they are the exact same size):

The Lynx model retails for $3,100 while the Hoshizaki model retails for about $1,400.  The only visible difference seems to be the handle and the Lynx logo.

Now when I bought the equipment I did so believing that Lynx actually made their own products. So the ultimate question is, does the Lynx brand image mean that much to me that I would have knowingly bought it over the Hoshizaki?

let’s ponder that…

Is it me or do they really mean “Asian Mix”? Otherwise what kind of rug is in that bag?

What do you think? Cool to call it “Oriental Mix”?

My wife and I went over to a shopping plaza called Crown Bay to try out the new BBQ place called Jumbies (excellent by the way) when we stumbled on this brand new store called “Cbay“.

Click the photo to enlarge:

What a creative name and logo I mumbled to myself. It’s almost like I’ve seen it before. Hmmmm, as I ponder through my mental rolodex. I got it! I proclaimed out loud…

Ebay – Cbay, how ingenious these smart (and I’m using that very sarcastically) business people are. I can see the big strategy meeting now…

Hey I love Ebay…

If only we could come up with a name like it.

Hey what rhymes with Ebay? Or wait better yet make it Crown Bay, Ebay-ish…

Abay, nah…Bbay, nah, Cbay? Holy cow…C for Crown and Bay for, um..er Bay. The quest has ended!

So there you have it. A completely ripped off logo from Ebay. What do you think blog readers? Is it cool to rip off a logo like this? Don’t hold back, tell me how you really feel.

Play and have some fun with it. As long as you can back up your brand promise!